Moms, as Usual, Rise to the Challenge
Mother’s Day is around the corner and as a result of the coronavirus pandemic and the required quarantining and social distancing in communities across the country, it looks like many, if not most of us, could be forced to celebrate Mother’s Day via Zoom videoconference. Who’s up for a virtual Mother’s Day brunch? I am certain that I am not alone in saying that if we have to celebrate moms without actually physically being with them, it won’t be the same. I’m sorry, but an “air” hug and “air” kiss just don’t cut it.
This year, to put it mildly, is unlike any of the previous this century, and I am going to not only celebrate my ninety-year-old mom, but I am also going to celebrate the tremendous influence and impact moms have on society, especially of late. I have seen — and I suspect tens of millions of others nationwide — have also seen moms, in typical fashion, rise to meet a new challenge: the psychological and physical impact quarantine-at-home orders are having on our families and communities.
Since the outset of this pandemic, moms everywhere have taken the bull by the horns and made this time of uncertainty more tolerable, more communal, and less unsettling. Moms across the country are taking the lead in uniting our communities and neighborhoods and spreading messages of hope, unity, and compassion, and in doing so, they deserve our admiration and gratitude (not that they didn’t already have it).
In the past six or seven weeks, we have seen numerous examples — whether it has been in our neighborhoods or photos and videos posted on various social media platforms or on local newscasts — of myriad acts of kindness. If the spread of the coronavirus has a silver lining (and I believe there is more than one), it’s that our collective and shared experiences manifested by this pandemic have fostered a sense of community across the United States unlike any most of us have ever seen or experienced. We can all do our part to comfort and help friends, neighbors, and strangers, but I believe moms are the foremost driving force behind this heightened sense of community and altruism.
When we first got word that our local schools would be closed for the rest of the school year, a friend and I texted and the crux of our texts boiled down to “What are we going to do?” The very same day my wife and several of her mom friends started a group text laying out plans for group physical activity for our kids in our neighborhood park (this was before the social distancing edict). They exchanged ideas and created schedules for the kids that boiled down to “This is what we are going to do.” I was (and still am) in awe of how quickly my wife and the moms in our circle of friends and neighborhood sprung into action. They put their heads together and came up with solutions to a problem none of us have ever experienced before.
But moms are doing far more than creating schedules for the kids. In typical fashion, moms are inspiring others with their selfless acts, and while it may be fleeting, bringing smiles to children and adults during a time that’s a bit scary for both.
Have you seen teddy bears and other stuffed animals displayed in the windows, or propped up on the balconies of homes in your neighborhood? I imagine you have. Did teddy bears suddenly become extroverts? No — the teddy bears appeared so little kids in neighborhoods from Maine to California can spot them(and ostensibly have a scavenger hunt) while out and about with their families. With parks, playgrounds, and just about every other place parents take their kids for fun closed, this simple gesture is entertaining kids (and let’s be honest, adults as well) who may be too young to fully comprehend the situation we are in. I’m pretty sure that in my neighborhood and in neighborhoods all over the United States, moms are leading these whimsical and creative window displays.
Due to shelter-at-home orders, traditional birthday parties for young and old have, unfortunately, had to be sacrificed. Everyone, especially kids, deserves a birthday party. So, how do we celebrate birthdays during a pandemic? We get together a caravan of vehicles for a drive-by birthday celebration. The other day my wife, our two daughters and I were walking our dog in our neighborhood and saw a friend and her neighbor decorating their cars with balloons, streamers, and hand-drawn “Happy Birthday!” signs. Our friend Martha told us they were part of a larger group that was heading out to wish a little girl in the neighborhood happy birthday via caravan. Again, I would venture to guess that moms, who let’s face it, almost always take the lead in planning family members’ birthday parties, are the catalysts behind most of these drive-by birthday celebrations.
I know we are not getting out nearly as much as we usually do, but have you noticed bright or pastel colors on the sidewalks in your neighborhood? Sidewalk chalk art has always been a colorful and creative way to write messages, words of inspiration, and/or draw images such as rainbows, flowers, and butterflies; during a pandemic when most of us are hunkered down in our homes for the better part of the day, this favorite kid pastime has taken on a new meaning. Walking around our neighborhood it seems that there are sidewalk art displays with messages of hope on every block. Just the other day my wife, daughters, and I gave our friends a sidewalk chalk art surprise in front of their house. We wrote messages on the sidewalk to each of their four children and my daughters drew several creative and fun images. Our friend was so moved by this gesture that she posted a video of our chalk art creation to her Facebook page. Who inspired this impromptu sidewalk art greeting? My wife, of course.
How do we stay connected and enjoy a cocktail (or two or three) when we are stuck at home and can’t physically get together with friends and family members? For a lot of us virtual happy hours via Zoom are the answer. My wife and I have participated in a few virtual happy hours with friends — always coordinated and scheduled by the group of moms — and something so simple seems to be cathartic for everyone involved.
Here’s another good example that makes it abundantly clear how moms are taking the lead during this time. The other night the principal at our youngest daughter’s middle school, along with a certified “parenting counselor,” co-hosted a digital “Pandemic Parenting Workshop” on Zoom. Twenty-four of the twenty-seven parents who participated in the workshop video conference were moms. I participated (primarily as an observer as I was a bit distracted by round one of the NFL draft) as the moms shared their thoughts, feelings, and observations with the counselor and each other. I walked away at the end of the workshop even more convinced that as long as moms “are on the job,” we got this.
Medical and healthcare professionals, grocery store workers, and other front-line and first responders are deservedly being called the true heroes in the fight against the coronavirus pandemic. While most moms may not be treating COVID-19 patients, I would also add them to this list of heroes. Moms have an innate instinctive ability to always know and do what is best for their families and community, especially in times of crisis. Their collective mindfulness and actions in the face of adversity make us appreciate what’s truly important: family and friends and even strangers coming together to lift each other’s spirits.
Are moms the only ones doing incredible things at this time? Of course not, and I am not insinuating that others from all walks of life aren’t stepping up with selfless acts during the pandemic. In this time of uncertainty, moms are making sure we are there to comfort each other, stay connected (even if we are apart), and be there for others, especially those most in need. In other words, moms are doing what they always do.
